Showing posts with label Douchetator. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Douchetator. Show all posts

11 October 2009

Fidel Castro agrees with me: Obama's Nobel was a Consolation Prize

It was a consolation prize for losing the Olympics. Check the douchebag ex-dictator out:
The decision to award the Nobel Peace Prize to US President Barack Obama was 'a positive measure and compensates his defeat in Copenhagen when Rio de Janeiro was picked as a site for 2016 Olympic Games', Cuban leader Fidel Castro has said.

He added that Obama's Nobel win could be considered a condemnation of the 'genocidal policies' of some of the former US presidents.
I don't agree with his other verbal diarrhea. Genocidal policies, you mean like Obama telling the Jews they aren't allowed to reproduce in Judea and Samaria? That sounds pretty damn genocidal to me. Or do you mean Bush protecting the Iraqi Kurds and Shiites from Saddam Hussein, who really was conducting genocide? Or the successes against HIV and AIDS in Africa thanks to Bush's AIDS fighting policies?

Face it Fidel: The only genocide committed by the last president was the senseless murder of his speeches. He just was not up to your or Obama's weight class as a demagogue.

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19 September 2009

Nancy Napoleonosi: Power is my Boytoy

This has got to be the best exclusive photo and interview I have ever gotten. I got to talk, well, listen to Nancy Pelosi in person! It went like this:


The Empress of San Francisco, Lady Protector of the Golden Gate, Patroness of the Teabaggers Guild and Salad Tossers Guild of the Castro District, High Druidess of the Haight, Lady Nancy Napoleonosi, appears before you to bestow upon you an immeasurably valuable nugget of her wisdom.

Hearken and learn, oh ye bitter clinging douchebags of the outlying provinces. Open your provincial proletarian ears and listen to your betters when they deign to grace you with their superior aristocratic wit.

Props to Reagan Fanatic for the excellent photoshop.

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17 September 2009

Why say 'Fascist'?

I must apologize in advance for being a buzzkill with a serious post. Rake me over the coals in the comments, oh ye of refined douche tastes. For I will not contribute my fair share of mockery in this posting.

Ace of Spades doesn't think that "fascist" is a useful word when it comes to Obama.
I have long disliked the "FASCIST" claims, not just when they came every single day from the left, but now, too, as they come from the right.

There are several problems with the word.

1. It's not true. Obama is not a fascist. He has done things on occasion that one can credibly argue tended in a fascist direction -- first thing that comes to mind? those Missouri prosecutors threatening to vaguely "Go after" anyone accusing Obama of false charges, like (giggle) that he would raise taxes on the middle class -- but an actual fascist? No.

2. It tends to suggest violence is the only means of political expression. If it were true that any president were a fascist, then... well, democratic society is dead, isn't it? We live in a tyranny. The normal respect we give to civil, civic means of political jockeying is dead and buried. Not only are we freed from the usual moral and legal restraints against political violence, but... well, we might say we're morally obligated to commit political violence, no?


Ace, dude, you aren't using the same definition of fascist that the people who call Obama a fascist are using. Fascism was a variant of socialism that arose out of the Italian fasci, or factions. These were unions. Both socialism and fascism become totalitarian. Both can be nationalist or internationalist. The important difference between them, the economic difference between fascism and socialism is that in socialism, the state owns all the property, while in fascism, property belongs in theory to individuals but because the state controls everything about property the "owner" doesn't have any of the traditional property rights, like the right to improve, sell or give his property to someone else, or change the way it is being used without government approval. Some people call the economic system fascist or state corporatism. Mussolini's fascism was compatible with, and grew out of anarcho-syndicalism: the domination of society by trade unions. Then the state, meaning the government, took over all the businesses and managed them for its benefit. Fascists also spent a lot of time and energy attacking laissez-faire economics and international corporations.

Notice anybody recently issuing trillions of dollars in giveaways to unions and taking over private companies? Think GM and Chrysler and the banks. Think insurance industry. Think health insurance, hospitals, clinics, and doctors' offices for the healthcare highjack. Think EFCA/Card Check. Notice anybody calling laissez faire economics a failed system and blaming international corporations for not paying their fair share of taxes? Notice anybody planning to nationalize lots of businesses and succeeding with several industries already? All the signs point to fascism on the horizon. That is why people are writing "Fascism" on signs.

I don't blame them a frakking bit.

"Fascist" in this context isn't a simple little insult, like "douchebag" or "teabagger." It isn't the Stalinist distraction from Stalin's own totalitarian oppression. It is a technically correct word to describe the form into which the state is being molded. And if you know your history, it is scary as all hell! Because after the fascism arrives, that's when you get to the coercive totalitarian state and the death camps and all that obvious evil. That's the fascism and naziism you are thinking of.

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12 September 2009

Oleg Atbashian is my Progressive-bashing hero!

Here it is in on only a few lines, the form of the propaganda that underLIES every single progressive douchebag's verbal technicolor yawn.

Generated in the depths of KGB think tanks, the Cold War-era propaganda template is comprised of the following linked axioms:
  1. Socialism is “progress.”
  2. Aversion to “progress” is a sign of outmoded backward thinking.
  3. All forward-thinking people are leftists.
  4. Leftists always speak for all people.
  5. People always unanimously support leftist leaders.
  6. Leftists are always under assault from the well-organized capitalist enemy.
  7. All workers and peasants hate capitalist exploiters.
  8. Armed resistance to a leftist government can only conceivably be staged by CIA agents in the service of American imperialism.
  9. Capitalists engage in relentless anti-socialist propaganda, subversion, and sabotage; they will commit any crime in order to kill hope and prevent the masses from liberation.
  10. The dying non-socialist sector of the world is run by a criminal conspiracy of capitalist oligarchs operating from the United States (and sometimes from Israel when appropriate).

Oleg, if you were teh ghey, and if I were teh ghey, I'd happily blow you. But things being what they are, I won't. NTTAWWT.

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04 September 2009

Qaddafi hates Cuckoo Clocks and Chocolate

Now that he has his pet airplane bomber back, Libyan douchetator Qaddafi hates cuckoo clocks and chocolate so much he has proposed that the United Nations abolish Switzerland. Luckily enough, the UN is entirely devoid of power unless the US provides that power. Remind me again why the US provides any muscle to the UN, when proposals such as Qaddafi's are what we typically expect from that temple to Progressivism and the terrible results of idealistic intentions.

I think that Bolton said you could cut off the top five stories of the UN and get the same benefits from it. Why stop there? Raze the UN to the ground baby, and build a Sizzler instead. It would create much more happiness than the doucheteria that is sitting there now.

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Why pick on Progressives?

Progressives are neo-barbarian, luddite fools who want to replace all scientific progress with their failed, pseudo-scientific, utopian fairy tale and take us back to the paleolithic period. In other words they are douchebags.

Q: Do you have a problem with Progressive Insurance?

We don't have a problem with their insurance product. But the company is also a major giver of money to politically progressive causes, and because of that the owners and managers are total douchebags.

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