Democrat Logo: Fixed It For You

Progressive Douchebag Watch is a little late to the party but it finally struck us this week exactly what the new look Democrat logo really needs. First, here is the new look Democrat logo. Pretty (D)umb, right?



Let's examine it. The dim D, apparently standing for dim Democrat, is surrounded by the much bolder O, apparently standing for Obama. This illustrates the subservient nature of the Democratic Party to the personality cult of Obama. That is very important to the new fascist future of the USA under Maximum Leader Obama. There are three fonts in this logo, to demonstrate the incoherent policies and behavior of Democrats. And there is the same vacuous Change in the slogan, promising who knows what and delivering (D)isappointment and (D)espair to everyone. Good choices, Democrats. You have made a good start at describing Democrats' (D)umb party.

But you aren't there yet. Our crack staff thought that the circled D looked like a letter grade. Since the Democrats have manifestly failed in all they tried to do, it can't be the right grade. So let's fix that grade and make the slogan match it.



However, there is another possibility. D- might have been Obama's letter grade from Harvard.



That answer makes sense all right. But why would the Democrats want to advertise Obama's grades now, when they could have proved he actually passed Harvard without cheating by releasing these before the 2008 elections. Of course, Obama did give himself a grade of B-. Perhaps if the Democrats want to really become the Barack-ocrat Party they should just go all in now. Here is a logo that emphasizes the Barackyness of the Democratic Party and also reminds the voters of one of their proudest allies in the teachers' unions that have such a terrific job with the nation's failing schools.



After Velma Hart made her famous comment about Hot Dogs and Beans, the staff thought perhaps that the new reality Democrats had brought to Americans should be part of their logo. So they simplified back down to the original logo and changed the slogan to match.



But, you know the fact is that D just doesn't cut it. D is too high a grade for the Democrats. Unlike in school, effort doesn't count in real life. What counts is results. The real grade must be a low F. To really run on their undefeated record of failure after failure, going back 80 years to when Franklin Delano Roosevelt stretched out a one year recession into a 16 year Great Depression, every single economic and other decision made by the socialist/fascist FDR type of Democrats has proved that the road to hell is paved with good intentions and stupid Democrat policies.



We think that this final logo for the Democrats, I mean Failocrats, sums up the history of their party in the 20th and 21st century quite well. It's time to consign the socialist/fascist Democrats to the ash-heap of history along with all their logos.

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Going Rouge seems designed to trick consumers, make them furious and vengeful

What is the over/under on a class action lawsuit against the editors of The Nation for tricking consumers and bookstores into spending their hard-earned money on the left's worthless, spiteful crap instead of the Palin book?

Wasn't burning down her church with women and children inside enough to satisfy their black and shriveled hearts?

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CT Repubs get sense of humor, Douchebag Dems cry like little babies

It's hard to see what they're talking about when they include no pics, but that's about what I'd expect from an "Advocate." CT Repubs have been tweeting away in satirical abandon until their satirical accounts tempted Democrat crybabies to complain to Twitter that people thought the satire was real.

In other words, the satire was hitting too close to home.

"It's hard enough to explain what we're doing here in Hartford," said Lesser. "It's even more difficult when you've got political hacks going out of their way to confuse people."

Democrats hold a veto-proof majority in the state House, outnumbering Republicans 114-37. The Democrats also have a 24-12 margin in the state Senate. Those numbers have been frustrating the hell out of GOP leaders, who have seen their share of General Assembly seats shrivel in successive legislative elections.

Waaaaaaah! Pussies can't handle it when they have completely dominant positions in the legislature and get to pass any idiotic bill they want. Now they need to legislate dominance on Twitter too! Pussies!

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ACORN and WFP Vote Fraud in NY

Douchebags who stole an election in Troy NY with fraudulent absentee ballots need to be tarred and feathered in jail, sideways, by a 7 foot tall psychopath with a skin condition.

Voter ID isn't just a nice thing. It is the only thing that will protect the vote of honest people from getting nullified by Douchebag criminality.

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How can every single bill in Congress have the same name?

To wit, "How to Fuck over the USA in 1000 or more Mind-numbing, Union Gifting, Economy destroying, Freedom stealing, Paranoia-Inducing, Insanely Expensive Pages."

I guess that Baucus, which should be pronounced "Fuck Us," is the main perpetrator of this particular country-rape.

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They Deny Reality Because they Grieve for the Public's Rejection of the Fascist Healthcare Highjack

There are seven stages of grief, or so says this douchebag site.

1. Shock or Disbelief
   

2. Denial
   

3. Bargaining
   

4. Guilt
   

5. Anger
   

6. Depression
   

7. Acceptance and Hope

Which stage is Obama at?

Oct. 16 (Bloomberg) -- President Barack Obama told a group of Democratic Party donors in San Francisco he’s determined to outlast his critics to move ahead on his agenda, including revamping the health-care system and financial regulations.

“Some of our opponents think they are going to wear us down,” Obama said at a fundraiser for the Democratic National Committee last night at the Westin St. Francis Hotel in San Francisco. “I’m not tired, I’m refreshed.”

Sounds like denial to me. It isn't just a river in Egypt where Obama went to apologize to the 57 states of the Muslim world.

That's the second stage. At least they're over the Disbelief stage, where they blamed the public's reaction on racism or some other bullshit. Now they want to pay the over 65 crowd $250 to vote for their favorite form of euthanasia. I guess that's bargaining. I hope they find their way to depression soon and stay there for four years, along with the econosuck they've forced into the Great Depression v.2.

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Which US Representative is running away fastest from doing his job?

Looks like Douchebag Dennis Kucinich to me.

I guess the Douchebags don't want to hold a vote to investigate corruption in DC and Countrywide (Dodd/Obama, CT/IL). It's not like the real estate collapse had anything to do with the national and world econosuck.

That's called sarcasm, for those Progressives too stupid to recognize it.

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Ike Skelton (D) cusses out fellow Missourian (R) on a hot mike

It was no "you lie" moment. It was more of a "so stick it up your asshole" moment. I'll leave it to anyone with a frakking brain to decide whether it's more offensive to say that someone lies when it's easily proven or that they should stick something up their asshole. Hmm, lie, asshole, lie, asshole, lie, asshole. And that brings me to Ike Skelton, douchebag and lying asshole. Did I mention he's an asshole?

Reached Friday afternoon, Skelton said that he'd just gotten frustrated. "In the heat of the moment, unfortunate things are said," he explained

Unfortunate things were said, and according to Skelton (D) he was not responsible for saying them even if they slipped out of his rectum-like mouth, turdlike. Stay classy, Skelton (D) and all you other Democrat Douchebags. Keep up the good work, by which I mean the bad work.

In related news, though Democrat Douchebags cannot figure out why it might be happening, Republicans are challenging Skelton's seat in 2010.

It couldn't have anything to do with Skelton (Douchebag). Or could it?

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Turns out the meaning of Change is 30 cents on the Dollar

Earn a dollar and you get to keep 30 cents. That's going to be the effect of the Baucus Healthcare Reform bill on American families between 100% and 200% of the poverty line. Greg Mankiw cites Jim Capretta on his (Mankiw's) blog. Who was the lying motherdoucher who said there would be no tax increases on anyone earning under $250,000?

Obama voters, now that we know the meaning of change, how do you like your 30 cents in your pocket from each dollar you earn?

It's not like you could have figured out he was lying at the time, right?

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Some Douchebags might blame their own failures on Apaches, but not Stu Bykofsky

Douchebags (by which I mean Democrats) should be running not walking to clamp eyes on Stu Bykofsky's road to Damascus moment about dysfunctional Philadelphia politics.

Next month, will Philadelphians hoping for an improved city again elect nothing but Democrats and expect a different result?

Under Democratic monopoly, Philly residents have: the highest city tax rate in the nation, craven Council members cashing in on DROP, an incompetent Board of Revision of Taxes, a 25 percent city poverty rate, a pinball pay-to-play system, a Department of Human Services that kills kids, a school district with a near-50-percent dropout rate and city workers who don't pay their taxes.

As a wholly owned subsidiary of the over-promising and underperforming Democratic Party, Philadelphia is failing.

Democratic politicians and policies are not solely responsible for our decline, but they've been in the driver's seat for a tortoise's lifetime and have driven the car into a ditch. If Democrats aren't responsible, who is - Apaches?

Will you ever hold them accountable?

Hold them accountable?!?! This is the Democrat party, you know. Being a Democrat means never having to say you're sorry, because you get a pass for any fucking thing you do because after all you're just a nice and kind progressive who wants to take all this extra money that was just sitting in the pockets of other people and spend it on bullshit for no sensible reason that could be detected by anyone other than a obsessive, manic, paranoid-schizophrenic blasted out of his brain on fifty-eight doses of windowpane acid. Wiggly!

Imagine measuring Democratic policies by their outcomes! Fucking A! That would be amazing! Did crime rates go up or down when they started freeing criminals from prison for passing one drug test in a row? How about stopping spankings? Did that increase or decrease graduation rates? Literacy rates? Rates of shootings in schools? How about the Great Society, did that improve rates of illegitimacy or poverty? How about the fucking WAR ON FUCKING POVERTY? Did that reduce any poverty?

Anywhere?

Hello? Knock knock, anybody home in the progressive brain trust?

Philadelphia is doomed...

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Nancy Napoleonosi: Bad Blue Dogs! No Biscuit!

Much to my happy surprise, Nancy Napoleonosi deigned to mandate another interview with her. Once again it started like this.

The Empress of San Francisco, Lady Protector of the Golden Gate, Patroness of the Teabaggers Guild and Salad Tossers Guild of the Castro District, High Druidess of the Golden Gate Park, Warden of Haight Crimes, Lady Nancy Napoleonosi, appears before you to bestow upon you an immeasurably valuable nugget of her wisdom.

Hearken and learn, oh ye bitter clinging douchebags of the outlying provinces. Open your provincial proletarian ears and listen to your betters when they deign to grace you with their superior aristocratic wit, you proletarian half-wits.

Then the Empress spake.

Pelosi (Douchebag-Califreakylvania.) rejected the idea of a “trigger” for a public option. That means that the government-run healthcare plan would be a fallback option, enacted only if other reforms didn’t make healthcare more accessible.

“I don't even want to talk about a trigger,” Pelosi said at her weekly press conference. She said the “attitude” of her fellow Democrats is that “a trigger is an excuse for not doing anything.”

She then turned and left the room, but not before stabbing me in the thigh with an ornately carved dagger. As I writhed in pain on the floor, she muttered in satisfaction, "I'm ready for you, Blanche Lincoln, you bitch!"

h/t: bluegrass pundit

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Wear that Badge of Honor with Pride, Joe!

Joe Wilson was the first Congressman in history to ever be formally rebuked for calling a lie a lie by the House of Representatives. Under the leadership of Nancy Pelosi (Douchebag, Uranus) the Democrats all voted on a party line that Wilson was a douchenozzle for calling a lie, a lie.

These are the Douchebags who found what Wilson did so fricking deplorable.

Yeah, classy as we expect from the House of Reprehensibles, the universe's most feebleminded, morally retarded herd of intellectually dishonest liars, perverts, hypocrites, and treasonous cowards, who give aid and comfort to the enemy. I notice they didn't ban "douchebag" in their hypocritical, intellectually dishonest resolution. That's because the truth is an absolute defense.

Congressman Joe Wilson, your rebuke, from Nancy Pelosi and the most unpopular Congressional gang of cut-throats, brigands, and highwaymen since Congressional popularity began to be measured, is a badge of honor. With it, you will defeat all Democrats who challenge you. Because of it, your name shall eclipse the name of the douchebag who traveled to Sudan and lied about what he learned there in order to falsely smear a President and treasonously lend aid and comfort to an enemy during wartime. Because of it, you have become a standard-bearer not only in the House of Reprehensibles, not only in the battle against the healthcare highjack, but also in the war against Orwellian, politically correct bullshit.

Call em like you see em, Joe. And may you and your fellow truth-tellers in the House continue to amass badges of fricking honor from the battle to be able to call a lie, a lie.

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Why don't Michigan Unions want to be put on the state run health insurance program?

Isn't this what their political party wants to do to the rest of the country? Everyone except for union workers and some federal government workers are going to get forced into the public option. If anyone is going to get forced into public insurance plans, it should be the goddamn unions who put these douchebags in office.

Fri, 08/28/2009 - 21:12 — NoGWBpolicyleft...
Here's one from our friendly neighborhood democrats in Michigan.

The Speaker of the House in Michigan (a Democrat) introduced a plan to require all public employees be put under one state run health insurance program.

Basically, another "screw the working class" proposal.

Needless to say, all of us employees who have had our wages slashed due to lack of raises over the last fifteen years are not too happy.

In that time we have had 12 raises that amounted to less than 1.2%! That means, we have really taken a pay cut. Six of those year we got zero% raise in order to keep our health insurance. Despite that, we have also taken concessions on health insurance two of the last four years to help keep our districts afloat! We opened our contracts to do that - the ultimate in good faith.

Now, this bluedog introduces this rightwing fantasy legislation that would destroy a major portion of what is left of Michigan's middle class. They have already crushed the U.A.W., and now, a DEMOCRAT introduces legislation that would basically destroy collective bargaining rights for workers, and crush the last vestige of worker opposition to the corporate fascists!

I called this little bastards office a few weeks ago, and got a very young kid who laughed at me when I asked if the Speaker really was from the party of FDR? He said laughing, "that was 50 years ago." He was totally ignorant, and the biggest dipshit I have talked to since I called Max Baucus' office a couple of years ago. Maybe it was the same guy?

So I moved on to the Speaker Pro Tem and talked to a very intelligent guy who completely understood everything at stake. His mother was a teacher, and he felt that the Speakers legislation would have to be supportive of workers and unions rights. He also was apalled when I told him of the bluedog jackass I talked to in the Speakers office and wanted his name.

In 2006, the repukes controlled our State House of representatives 58 - 52. After last year, the democrats hold a 67 - 43 majority thanks to the hundreds of thousands of public employees who campaigned and supported them.

And this is what we got in return; a big fat knife in the back!

Well, this blogger has finally had enough! I am going to start a petition demanding his resignation as Speaker, or that the House democrats strip him of his Speakership role. If they don't, they can try to win re-election next year without the 500,000 public employees, their spouses and family members support!

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Democrat false flag attack on Denver Democrat Douchequarters

The SEIU and ACORN would never do this, right? No Democrats, except these two Democrats who have a history of working as paid campaigners for Democrats, would ever do this, right? Bullshit! That's the Chicago way.

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Do you dress like a Douchebag?

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No Photo ID requirement to vote, just to attend "Mean" Eugene Green's stacked Town Hall

"Mean" Eugene Green (Douchebag, TX) is shivering with fear like a stack of commie-red jello slices on a subway seat at the idea that people might get upset at the thought of the healthcare high-jack he supports. He's such a sissy he doesn't want any of them anywhere near him, so he's going to keep those paid Republican protesters who get bussed in from out of district out of his Town Hall meeting. You see, old "Meany" is going to check photo IDs to prevent people who are not allowed to vote in his district from attending his precious Town Hall.

Lookee here.

Town hall meetings are one of my favorite ways to communicate with constituents. I have held hundreds during my years of service in Congress and always welcomed everyone to attend. Unfortunately, due to a coordinated effort to disrupt our town hall meetings, we will be restricting further attendance to residents of the 29th Congressional District and verifying residency by requiring photo identification. Whether individuals agree or disagree, we must maintain order to have a civil discussion of the issues. While I regret this restriction, it is necessary for the safety and consideration of our constituents. Those who do not reside in the 29th Congressional should contact their Member of Congress to voice any concerns that they may have on issues before Congress.

That's cool, "Meany." When you get back to DC we all fully expect you to sponsor a Voter ID law to keep those out-of-district yahoos from voting in their own district, and then getting in the ACORN, SEIU or AFL-CIO short-bus and voting in your district. You know what I'm talking about, "Meany," just like the Democrats have always done it in Texas. I think LBJ was even proud of it.

But here's the tough question... What are you going to do when your Town Hall is still filled up with your actual constituents who drove themselves to your meeting and made their signs at home, on the kitchen table, with markers they bought themselves, and who do not want you to high-jack their health insurance with the bills currently under consideration? Are you going to shout "The reason is... Shut up! I won! and George Bush"? That's what your spastic leader does. Act like a horse's ass and shout George Bush, just like a two year old telling lies they didn't pee in their pants and blaming it all on a big brother.

Well, George W. Bush may have acted like a big brother to you and your juvenile delinquents in the Douchebag party, but we all know who wants to be the Big Brother from 1984. Mmm hmm, it's Kenya's favorite politician. Unfortunately, he's not America's favorite politician anymore, just the douchebags' fave. And the number of douchebags is shrinking.

Toodles, Toots! I'll see ya when it comes to tarring and feathering time.

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Iraq War Veterans Against the War running for Congress

The face of the IVAW is one of veterans who have turned against their country. I don't take lightly that the members of this group fought for the United States of America however I do take umbrage with their means for ending the war. They, like John Francois Kerry, joined groups who forced the war to go on longer than was necessary.

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