30 September 2009

The holey book of Ogenesis I and II

Ogenesis I

1 First Barack made his campaign. 2 The campaign was without form and void, and hope and change was upon the face of the nation, and the Spirit of Barack Obama was upon the face of modern politics. 3 And Barack said, "Let there be lies", and there was lies. 4 And Barack saw that the lies were good, and Barack separated them from the truth. 5 Barack lied during the Day, and then there was Night. He lied in the evening and then there was morning, day one.

6 And Barack said, "Let there be talking points in the midst of the campaign, and let them separate the truth from the lies." 7 And Barack made talking points and separated the lies which were believed and the truth which was not. 8 And Barack called the talking point truth. And it was so. He lied in the evening and then there was morning, a second day.

9 And Barack said, "Let the lies under the campaign be gathered together into one place, and let treasure appear." And it was so. 10 Barack called the treasure minimum wage, and the hoards that were gathered together he called sheeple. And Barack saw that he was good. 11 And Barack said, "Let us put forth fabrication, townhall plants and fruitcakes bearing their labor, each according to its kind, upon the campaign." And it was so. 12 And Barack saw that it was good. 13 And he lied that evening and then there was morning, a third day.

14 And Barack said, "Let there be hope and change in the talking points and let them be a signal of change and hope for seasons and for days and years, 15 and let there be obfuscation in the talking points to create confusion upon the sheeple." And it was so. 16 And Barack proclaimed dissimulation to rule the day, and equivocation to rule the night. 17 And Barack set them to give cover upon the campaign, 18 to rule over the days headline, and to separate the truth from the talking point. And Barack saw that he was good. 19 And he lied in the evening and then there was morning, a fourth day.

20 And Barack said, "Let the sheeple bring forth swarms of undead creatures, and let the criticism fly above the campaign." 21 So Barack created the great and greedy monsters and every undead creature that moves, according to their kinds, and every worthless cretin according to its kind. And Barack saw that they were voters. 22 And Barack blessed them, saying, "Be misleading and rob the honest sheeple when they turn away, and let the felons multiply and vote early and often." 23 And there was lying in the evening and there were waffles to break his fast in the morning, a fifth day.

24 And Barack said, "Let the organizers bring forth undead creatures according to their kinds: Acorn slackers and SEIU brutes and turf-masters of the campaign according to their kinds." And it was so. 25 And Barack paid the turf-masters according to their kinds and the slackers and the hungry community organizers according to their kind. And Barack saw that they were voters. 26 Then Barack said, "Let us make all voters in our image, after our likeness, and let us teach them that socialism is just and let us take control over the earning of their gold, and over the size of their chariots, and over all progressive douchebags that tread upon our fatherland." 27 So Barack created the liberal activists in his own image, in the image of himself he created them, male, female, transgender.

28 And Barack blessed them, and Barack said to them, "Reach out to the unwashed and multiply, fill the campaign with your treasure, and have nationalization over the stores of gold and over the chariots and over every undead thing that moves upon the land." 29 And Barack said, "Behold, I have given you every teaparty plants yielding signage which is upon the face and around the shoulder and head area of all who dare get in their way, 30 and Barack said the beatings were good. 31 And Barack saw the chaos that he had wrought, and behold, it was very good. And he lied that evening and then there was morning, a sixth day.

Ogenesis II

1 Thus the outlandish rhetoric and the eternal campaigning had begun. 2 And on the seventh day Barack pondered his fraud and deception which he had done. 3 So Barack blessed the seventh day and hallowed it, because on it Barack rested from all his calumniation.

4 In the day that Lord Barack made the campaigns and the rhetoric, 5 when no townhall plant was yet under the bus and no green-shoots in the field had yet sprung up, for the Lord Barack had not yet caused it to rain gold upon the campaigns...there was no Acorn to fill the ballot boxes, 6 but a Soro's funded mist escaped from the depths and spread wealth to the whole face of Democrat party.

7 Then Lord Barack formed Acorn from the graft, and deposited into it's coffers the breath of life, and Acorn became a living being. 8 For the Lord Barack created a garden of Cheaten, in the east, and there he put the Acorn whom he had formed. 9 And out of the mist of Soro's, Lord Barack made Acorn grow mighty branches of mendacity, the SEIU was also planted amongst the lush manure of media matters. 10 A river of gold flowed out of Cheaten to fund the garden, and there it was divided into countless tributaries.

11 The Lord Barack took the Acorn and put it in the garden of Cheaten to till it and keep it. 12 And the Lord Barack commanded the Acorn, saying, "You may freely violate every law of the garden, 13 but as to the law against prostitution of under-age girls you shall not violate, for in the day that you become a pimp you shall die a slow death beneath the wheels of my grand chariot."

14 Then the Lord Barack said, "It is not good that the Acorn should be alone, I will make helpers to fit it." 15 So out of the Democrat party the Lord Barack formed special groups, and brought them to the Acorn to see what it would name them, and whatever the Acorn called them, that was their name.

16 And thus the Lord Barack caused a deep catatonic sleep to fall upon the sheeple, and while they slept he took their liberty and left in its place, vilification, guilt and a monthly pittance, 17 and the fib which the Lord Barack had taken from the campaign he brought to the sheeple. 18 Then the Lord Barack said, "This at last is the flesh of my bone, behold it from behind, it shall be called socialism, and it shall feel good." 19 And thus going forward the Lord Barack will cleave into the womb of the founding fathers, and they shall become one. 20 And the Lord Barack will be naked with his dishonesty, and will not be ashamed.


The Congress Floor Song

Alan "The Boy Who Cried 'Wolf!'" Grayson decided to make a spectacle of himself on the house floor:

Then, when Republicans asked him to apologize (since he was lying hisfreakin' ass off), he responded with this:

In his honor, I've composedrewritten a little song:

The Congress Floor Song
(to the tune of David Allan Coe's "The Rodeo Song")

Well it's 40 below and I don't give a fuck,
Got a heater in my truck and I'm off to the Congress floor

It's the AARP left and the mob to the right
Come on you fuckin' dummy get your goose step right
Get off stage you god damn goof you know

You piss me off, you fuckin' jerk
You get on my nerves

Here comes Alan with his pecker in his hand,
He's a one term
man and he's off to the Congress floor

It's SEIU left and domestic terrorists right
Come on you fuckin' dummy get your goose step right
Get off stage you god damn goof you know

You piss me off, you One Term jerk
You get on my nerves

Well it's 40 below and I ain't got a
and I don't give a fuck 'cause I'm off to the Congress floor

Where it's ACORN left and hands off! right
Come on you fuckin' dummy get your goose step right
Get off stage you god damn goof you know

You piss me off, you fuckin' jerk
You get on my nerves

Here comes Alan with his pecker in his hand,
He's a one
ball man and he's off to the Congress floor

It's the DNC left and the GOP right
Come on you fuckin' dummy get your goose step right
Get off stage you god damn goof you know

You piss me off, you fuckin' jerk
You get on my nerves


Rectum? It destroyed him!

In August, the head of Saudi Arabia's counter-terrorism forces was almost killed by a terrorist ass-bomber who had pretended to be ready to rat out his al Qaeda comrades. Several Saudi secret service agents were killed. Imagine the scene after the explosion with body parts scattered about, the smell of blood and cordite, and the cries of the dying. How did it happen?

Inside a Saudi palace, the scene was the bloody aftermath of an al Qaeda attack in August aimed at killing Prince Mohammed Bin Nayef, head of Saudi Arabia's counter terrorism operations.

To get his bomb into this room, Abdullah Asieri, one of Saudi Arabia's most wanted men, avoided detection by two sets of airport security including metal detectors and palace security. He spent 30 hours in the close company of the prince's own secret service agents - all without anyone suspecting a thing.

How did he do it?

Taking a trick from the narcotics trade - which has long smuggled drugs in body cavities - Asieri had a pound of high explosives, plus a detonator inserted in his rectum. (emphasis mine)
How did he do it?...

Hope n'Change's Stilton Jarlsberg has a great cartoon that speculates on what TSA will do to make air travel even less bearable. Yes, they are guaranteed to do something depressing and degrading to everybody except the long-bearded young men who look like the motherfucker who stuffed a live bomb up his rectum. But let's not go there yet, though you, being a typical reader, and thus totally in control of our interaction, may do whatever the frak you want.

Maybe I should say that I won't go there yet. Because I'm awesome. And because the article never answered the question of how he did it.

How Did He Do It, Blago?

Look at the bold text. He did it by social engineering his way into the prince's presence. The terrorist asshole did it by conning people who should have known better that he had changed his ways. Even though he was the most wanted terrorist teabagger in a kingdom full of terrorists and terrorist sympathizers, he convinced them he was really misunderstood and was ready to join with the good guys against the forces of evil and corruption. IOW it was a confidence trick.

The Prince and his men could have easily stuck Asieri into a cinderblock jail and left him there. Or they could have x-rayed his ass and the rest of him as well. Or they could have done just about anything other than bringing him right to the Prince's presence. It makes you wonder if one of the secret service agents was collaborating with the ass-bomber. It seems just too frikking easy, doesn't it?

That's how he did it. He conned them. He was a fucking al Qaeda conman with a bomb up his bunghole. They fell for it.

The Prince's men fell for it. Maybe the Prince did too.

Anyway, what should the TSA do? Backscatter X-Rays. It's about time. And it will let us wear our shoes and belts through the checking stations. So what if the guards see through our clothes? That's just too bad, and if people who like to hide under giant black sacks are driven out of the air travel marketplace, all the better.


29 September 2009

Thou Shalt Have no God before the Holy Godking Obama

Much like the Emperors Caligula and Nero before him, and the Amon-Ra-begot Pharoahs before them, Emperor Obama has ascended to the rank of the deified Godkings.

Buy the Little Blue Book of the sayings of Comrade Barack Obama. Read it. Learn it. Love it.

Watch the Prayer to the Godking

Participate in the Prayer to the Godking

Learn the call and response to participate as fluently as these practiced worshippers from SEIU and ACORN.

Priestess: We are here for the healing of the nation

People: Yes

To the prophet Jeremiah we cry out
Is there no balm in Gilead?
Is there no physician here?
Why has not the health of my poor people been restored?

Hear our cry Obama

With the prophet MLK we cry out of all the barbs and inequalities
Injustice in healthcare is the most inhumane

Hear our cry Obama

From healthcare systems and industries that place profits over people

Deliver us Obama

From lobbying efforts that block access to quality healthcare for all

Deliver us Obama

From greed and fear that replace the reality of God's abundance and the power of community with the myths of scarcity and isolation

Deliver us Obama

From scapegoatism of immigrants, from blaming the poor, from all the evil attitudes which deem healthcare as a right of the privileged rather than a basic human right

Deliver us Obama

Protect all those who face illness without good healthcare insurance.

What a special feeling you must have after that amazing prayer. I know I have.


Iran Intelligence Fail: Freaking Traitor in the CIA ought to be drawn and quartered

Who is the freaking traitor in the CIA who:
  • Wrote the lie the Iran had stopped developing nuclear missile technology into the 2007 NIE; and
  • Told President Obama that Iran wouldn't have a nuclear missile until 2020?
The national intelligence agencies are retarded. They have no clue. Is there only one high up traitor, or are there lots of them? And how high up do they go? The rot has got to go pretty high to turn out multiple, ridiculously bad NIEs that make two successive POTUSes look like dumb-shits. Even progressive douchebags might get pissed this time. It made their Messiah, Lord Barack Milhous Obama the Most Merciful into a laughingstock. Well, actually, it just made the degree of his clownishness obvious to them.

Some just think the CIA is completely incompetent. I agree it's incompetent as an organization. But I also think it's chock full of America's enemies.


On Kevin Jennings: To a liberal, the highest ethic is Following the Agenda

You have to wonder what makes former teacher Kevin Jennings "Safe School Czar" material. Is it because of his groundbreaking work in violence prevention or school zone drug enforcement? Sure -- if you happened to be a gay highschool kid. If you were a straight kid getting hassled for your lunch money, or beaten up because your hair was red, in Jennings' Wild World of Education, you were shit outta luck. Kanye West, were he not himself a progressive douchebag, might say, "Kevin Jennings doesn't care about straight people." Then, of course, he'd drool on-stage ranting about how Beyonce is the best gay-kid protector ever. EVER!!

But still... Jennings worked pretty fucking hard making sure gay kids didn't get picked on, so that's gotta count for something... right? Well..... unless your problem happened to be less of the "Teacher, Gary won't stop calling me Cupcake" variety and more of the "Teacher, Stevie, the 60-yr-old janitor plunger-raped me" strain. In that case, you were pretty much handed a condom, congratulated for your Coming Out and told to enjoy it.


But, of course, the liberals don't care that Jennings failed to report a statutory rape while he was a teacher. They don't care that, in fact, he encouraged continued contact between the teenager-in-question and the 50-something child molester. They don't care because Jennings is gay and liberal. That not only means his judgement can't possibly be considered questionable -- it means that, in the eyes of Progressive douchebags everywhere, Kevin Jennings is a bona fide motherfucking hero. To wit:

...I'd encourage readers to do a little research on their own and gain a more robust understanding of who Kevin Jennings is and what he stands for. I think that many would be pleasantly surprised. I would absolutely want Kevin as a teacher at my child's school.
-commenter 'gghall'

Which of course, is why Kevin Jennings is perfect, in Obamaland, for this job. Just like, to a liberal, tax cheat Timmy Geithner was abso-fucking-lutely the right man to handle the reigns of finance.


28 September 2009

2016 Olympics Must Go To Rio de Janeiro!

Just Say "No" to Chicago!


Do it for the beaches. Do it for the weather. Do it for the babes!

Don't make me do it! Don't make me pull out the big guns! These ammo-pounders are going to make you surrender like a whimpering monkey baby. I warn you. I'm warning you! I'm warning you! Really! I'm! Warning! You!

You can't say I didn't warn you. You asked for it. Brazilian super-models follow, including Giselle Bundchen, aka Mrs. Tom Brady.

Smitty was right! It has to be Rio!


Apparently, it's part of French culture to drug and rape children

Just as I was about to give France some credit for Sarkozy's admonition to Obama about Iran's nuclear ambitions, I see this:

French foreign minister Bernard Kouchner called the detention of the film-maker - a French citizen - in Switzerland a "bit sinister".
So, arresting this pervert who drugged, raped and sodomized a thirteen year old girl is "sinister?"

Mr. Kouchner, you've won the "Douchebag of the Day" award. Congratulations!

And I don't buy the, "He's been punished enough," crap or the "he can't travel for fear of being arrested" garbage. His travel should be limited to an 8x10 cell with a seven-foot-tall, 300 pound body builder nicknamed "Mary" for a cell-mate.

Is it just me, or does it seem that when somebody in Hollywood commits a crime, all their buddy-buddies in the entertainment world come to their defense, no matter how heinous and disgusting it might have been?
The Swiss Directors Association also criticised the arrest, describing it as "not only a grotesque farce of justice, but also an immense cultural scandal".
Oh, it's a cultural scandal? I'm so sorry! I didn't realize that enforcing the law and asking criminals to serve their sentences was a cultural issue! I beg your pardon.

Polanski is clearly just a Jean Valjean character! So what if he's a rapist? The people defending him are probably just fine with having Polanski alone with their pre-teen children.

Yeah, probably about as comfortable as I am with Bernie Madoff handling my investments.


Perez Hilton: Oh No You Didn't, Barack Obama

This is a guest post from Perez Hilton, I think. All I know is he smelled like Pina Coladas and tried to kiss me when he gave me a DVD with this article on it.

Obama said Kanye West is a jackassBarack Obama must have gone loco from sleeping in the same room that that kookoo-for-cocopuffs George W. Bush used to sleep in, because he opened his trap to say something extremely rude in an interview the other day.

He said: "Kanye West is a jackass."

And we think there are just some politicos who spend all their time golfing and eating certified Japanese Wagyu beef because they are in over their head.

Just saying!

We give him credit because he knew he had done wrong, and so this morning he issued an apology to all our beautiful jackasses.

Obama says:

"I would like to issue an apology for the comments I made. My intent was to be humorous and not offensive. I have nothing but love and respect for jackasses in general of all cultural backgrounds. What saddens me most is that it took away from the issue of Health Insurance Reform in America, which is all I think about day and night except when I'm thinking about golf or Wagyu beef. I once visited a food pantry in the White House kitchen and told them to send all the American beef to feed the homeless. American beef isn't as exceptional as that delicious Wagyu beef from Japan. Anyway I work with many jackasses, not least among them Rahm Emmanuel. I didn't intend to tar them with Kanye West, since clearly he is in a different class from the typical jackass."

Isn't it interesting that living in the White House qualifies a person to claim to be surrounded by jackasses? Huh.

Do U think his statement is sincere? Or is he just being a jackass?


Return of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy

According to Bill "Linda Tripp Hater" Clinton, the Vast Right Wing ConspiracyTM is alive and well and attacking President Obama.

"It's not as strong as it was because America has changed demographically, but it's as virulent as it was," Clinton said today on NBC's "Meet the Press."
Seems that President Cigar Lover thinks that President Panderer's situation will turn out differently, because he has a "Positive AgendaTM" for the country.

"I mean they may be hurting President Obama," Bill Clinton said of the current attacks. "They can take his numbers down, they can run his opposition up, but fundamentally he and his team have a positive agenda for America. Their agenda seems to be wanting him to fail, and that's not a good prescription for a good America.
I take it, then, that Mr. Assault Weapons Ban failed to pass his healthcare plan because he didn't have a Positive AgendaTM? His words, not mine.

Clinton also thinks that the doom-and-gloom predictions (if you're a Democrat, that is) of a Republican takeover of the House are unfounded. He thinks America has fundamentally changed:

But, Clinton said, the current situation will not lead to a "repeat of 1994", when Democrats lost 15 seats in the House for the first time in 40 years, crippling progress on his administration's agenda. "There's no way they can make it that bad, for several reasons," Clinton said.

For one, he said, "The country is more diverse and interested in positive action.
You mean the "diverse" voting block put in place by vote fraud groups like ACORN? The block that includes illegal aliens and the Dallas Cowboys offensive line?

I'll agree with Slick Willie that Obama hasn't taken on the gun lobby, but I sincerely doubt the Gun Owners of America and the National Rifle Association are going to sit on their heels in 2010 and 2012. Democrats never saw a gun they didn't want to ban, and President Obama is from Chicago, where mere possession of a hand gun gets you convicted of child molestation.

Keep trying that misdirection with your Vast Right Wing ConspiracyTM lunacy, Willie. Keep dreaming about getting back into the White House. We all know that's your Positive AgendaTM.


27 September 2009

Youth Unemployment Catastrophe


How do you like this Change, all you douchebag SNL and MTV watching youths who voted for Obama? Well, maybe now you can beg for change on the street corner, thanks to Obama.

Obama voter:
Change, please?
Would you like to have a job where you didn't have to beg for money, didn't have to degrade yourself for money, didn't have people looking at you with pity all day long because you are such a hopeless, jobless loser?
Obama voter:
Of course!
Elections have consequences, asshole! I can't afford to hire you under the Obama policies, and neither can anyone else.

I guarantee there are two reasons why the jobs market for youth suck. First, the Congress has nearly doubled the minimum wage over the last four years. Second, employers are too afraid of tax increases to expand or hire. The result is that there are no entry level jobs in the USA.

I have more breaking news that I don't think any Obama voters ever heard before.
If a promise seems too good to be true, it probably is bullshit!


26 September 2009

If teaching fisting in schools is wrong, I don't want to know what's right: Kevin Jennings is appointed Safe and Drug-Free Schools Czar by Obama

Does anybody remember when Bill Clinton's Education Secretary Joycelyn Elders got fired for telling schoolkids to bop their bolognas and tickle their tacos? Ah, those were the good old days, the innocent days, prehistoric days before school teachers taught school kids as young as 12 to stick their fists into their gay lovers' bungholes.

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Wmy5J0qXsvQ/SY4Nc_wyzyI/AAAAAAAAAZo/XqTGDrKkzEA/s320/doctor-glove.jpgSome things are just so right freaking wrong the mind boggles. How can President Obama appoint some douchebag as director of the Office of Safe and Drug Free Schools (Drug-Free and Safe Schools Czar/Czarina) who is one of the founders of GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network)? At one of the group's conferences in Massachussetts, the group offered a seminar for students at which it taught kids about fisting.

A state official who spoke to teens at the conference said:

"Fisting (forcing one's entire hand into another person's rectum or vagina) often gets a bad rap....[It's] an experience of letting somebody into your body that you want to be that close and intimate with...[and] to put you into an exploratory mode."
Who really thinks there is nothing wrong with it?
  • "Fisting gets a bad rap"?
  • "Exploratory mode"?
WTF?!?! It's not like sticking your fist into someone's rectum can perforate their fucking intestine or something! Oh wait... It can. One of the things I know is that fisting is a violent violation of someone else. It has nothing to do with love, only sado-masochism. Jennings' position on teaching teabagging and salad-tossing in schools has not been reported, though I suppose if you have a strong stomach you can read one of his books.

Kevin Jennings also is in favor of promoting homosexuality in schools.
Jennings said he hoped that promoting homosexuality in schools would be considered fine in the future.

"One of our board members" was called to testify before Congress when they had hearings on the promotion of homosexuality in schools," Jennings said. "And we were busy putting out press releases, and saying, "We're not promoting homosexuality, that's not what our program's about. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.... '

"Being finished might someday mean that most straight people, when they would hear that someone was promoting homosexuality, would say 'Yeah, who cares?' because they wouldn't necessarily equate homosexuality with something bad that you would not want to promote."
This isn't all. In his 2007 autobiography, Mama's Boy, Preacher's Son: A Memoir, (what is it with autobiographies in the Obama administration?) Jennings described without regret his high school memories of getting drunk and stoned (and boned, one presumes). Only a drunken, stoned, progressive douchebag could think that's a good thing for the frakking czar of Drug Free Schools!

This is nucking futz!

Worse yet, Jennings admitted in several speeches and writings that he knew one of his 15 year old students was sexually active with at least one adult man, told the boy to use condoms, and did not report it. Teachers know if they find out something like that they face felony charges for not reporting it. Yet Jennings did not report it.
A professor at Grove City College in Pennsylvania, Warren Throckmorton, has produced an audio recording of a speech Jennings gave in 2000 at a GLSEN rally in Iowa, in which Jennings made it clear that he believed the student was sexually active:

"I said, 'What were you doing in Boston on a school night, Brewster?' He got very quiet, and he finally looked at me and said, 'Well I met someone in the bus station bathroom and I went home with him.' High school sophomore, 15 years old' I looked at Brewster and said, 'You know, I hope you knew to use a condom.'" [Audio is available on the professor's Web site.]

The Washington Times reported in 2004 that "state authorities said Mr. Jennings filed no report in 1988." A spokeswoman for the Massachusetts Department for Children and Families, the department to which Jennings -- as a Massachusetts teacher -- would have been legally obliged to report the situation, did not return calls

Jennings' career prepared him for the position in one way, because of his public emphasis on preventing the bullying of homosexual students in schools. But his career has been focused on promoting homosexuality and punishing "homophobia" among students, not on preventing bullying in general. He uses "safe schools" as a cover for propagandizing in favor of homosexuality, cross-dressing and transgenderism to children as young as kindergarten. And he does not say anything about the only actual proven way of permanently preventing bullying: teaching bullied kids to fight back against their tormentors. Bullies enjoy bullying others, but it isn't fun when their targets fight back. All it takes is the will to bloody the bully's nose or knock him down and pummel him until he begs for mercy to free a kid from a bully's oppression. Yet educated idiot teachers like Jennings punish kids who fight back against bullies while enabling the fucking bullies by preventing schools from expelling them. Maybe it's because so many bullies turn out to be sado-masochistic fisters or something? I wouldn't know. But the biggest problem with bullying these days is that in so-called zero-tolerance schools, bullies are not punished and tormented kids who fight back get expelled and criminally charged.

https://www.kachi-do.com/images/Boxing-liner-glove.jpgYou want safe schools? There is something you can teach elementary school kids to do with their fists that will prevent bullying, guaranteed. Teach kids to box when they're young and can't really hurt each other yet so they can fight back against bullies. You want homosexual kids to be safe from bullies? Teach them to box. It's amazing how a bloody nose instantly demoralizes a bully and sends him or her running, crying to the teachers. You want kids to be bullied their entire lives? Teach them to go crying to the teacher whenever they get bullied.

Remember, Obama told us, "Judge me by the people who surround me."

If Jennings is one of the people surrounding Obama, the verdict on the Obama Regime is Nucking Futz!


25 September 2009

The "Panderer in Chief" at the UN vs. the New Leader of the Free World

Title of "Leader of the Free World" Defaulted to Bibi
Breitbart has a video snippet of Binyamin Netanyahu giving the speech a strong capable US President would've given.
Shame one as described above couldn't have been there.

Netanyahu came to the podium following the Clown Show from the earlier acts of Gadhafi, Ahmadinejad, and everybody's leftist hero Barack Hussein Obama, and somehow was offended by what he heard earlier. More important he was offended by what he's been hearing for years;

"The man who called the Holocaust a lie spoke at this podium. To those who refused to come and to those who left in protest, I commend you. You stood up for moral clarity and you brought honor to your countries. But to those who gave this Holocaust denier a hearing, I say on behalf of my people, the Jewish people, and decent people everywhere -- have you no shame? Have you no decency?"

Who wouldn't be offended by the drooling rants of Mahmoud Ahmadinejad when he says, in essence, the nation of Israel deserves to be and should be destroyed?

Obama it seems is one not easily offended, at least by the rants of the world's dictators. US citizens legitimate complaints are a different matter.

John Boulton was shocked, even;
Bolton on Obama at the UN: "This is the most radical anti-Israel speech I can recall any president making" "I have to say I was very shaken by this speech"

Netanyahu came fully prepared to do battle, complete with evidence of a deliberate attempt to exterminate all the Jews (Translation for the leftist douchbags; "Them Joooos") from the Earth;

"Last month I went to a villa in a suburb of Berlin called Wannsee," Netanyahu went on. "There, on January 20, 1942, after a hearty meal, senior Nazi officials met and decided to exterminate my people. They left detailed minutes of that meeting, and these meetings have been preserved for posterity by successive German governments."

He waved the document in the air;

"Is this protocol a lie?" he asked. "Is the German government, all German governments, lying?"

It would seem they are all lying if the left and their idol Ahmadinejad are to be believed.

Contrast the strength of Netanyahu's words to the deposed Leader of the Free World [My emphasis];

Obama: " We continue to call on Palestinians to end incitement against Israel, and we continue to emphasize that America does not accept the legitimacy of continued Israeli settlements.

The time... (applause)... the time has come to relaunch negotiations without preconditions that address the permanent status issues. Security for Israelis and Palestinians, borders, refugees and Jerusalem. The goal is clear, two states living side by side in peace and security, a Jewish state of Israel with true security for all Israelis and a viable Palestinian state with contiguous territory that ends the occupation that began in 1967, and realizes the potential of the Palestinian people.

"The occupation" that began when Islamic states rose up to push Israel into the sea and were defeated? Okay Mr. President, contrast continues with Netanyahu;

"Perhaps some of you think that this man and his odious regime threaten only the Jews," he said. "But if you think that, you are wrong, dead wrong. History has shown us time and time again that what starts with attacks on the Jews, eventually ends up engulfing many, many others."

Netanyahu said that the Iranian regime was fueled by a fundamentalism that had burst onto the world 30 years ago and "has swept across the globe with a murderous violence that knows no bounds, and the cold-blooded impartiality in the choice of its victims. It has callously slaughtered Muslims and Christians, Jews and Hindus and many others."

Netanyahu said that the struggle against this fanaticism pitted "civilization against barbarism, the 21st century against the ninth century, those who sanctify life, against those who glorify death."

"Ultimately," he said, "the past cannot triumph over the future. And our future promises magnificent bounties of hope." Ticking off some of the technological achievements of the last hundred years, Netanyahu said, "We will find an alternative to fossil fuel, and yes, we will clean up the planet. But if the most primitive fanaticism can acquire the most deadly weapons, the march of history can be reversed" for a lengthy period, he warned. "This is why the greatest threat facing the world today is the marriage between religious fanaticism and weapons of mass destruction.

"Is the UN up to that?" Netanyahu asked. "Will the international community stand up to the despotism of a government against its own people?" - a reference to the recent elections in Iran. "The jury is still out on the UN. Recent signs are not encouraging."

Hugo Chavez said he could "Smell the hope".

Maybe it was just B.O.


Nancy Napoleonosi: Bad Blue Dogs! No Biscuit!

Much to my happy surprise, Nancy Napoleonosi deigned to mandate another interview with her. Once again it started like this.

The Empress of San Francisco, Lady Protector of the Golden Gate, Patroness of the Teabaggers Guild and Salad Tossers Guild of the Castro District, High Druidess of the Golden Gate Park, Warden of Haight Crimes, Lady Nancy Napoleonosi, appears before you to bestow upon you an immeasurably valuable nugget of her wisdom.

Hearken and learn, oh ye bitter clinging douchebags of the outlying provinces. Open your provincial proletarian ears and listen to your betters when they deign to grace you with their superior aristocratic wit, you proletarian half-wits.

Then the Empress spake.

Pelosi (Douchebag-Califreakylvania.) rejected the idea of a “trigger” for a public option. That means that the government-run healthcare plan would be a fallback option, enacted only if other reforms didn’t make healthcare more accessible.

“I don't even want to talk about a trigger,” Pelosi said at her weekly press conference. She said the “attitude” of her fellow Democrats is that “a trigger is an excuse for not doing anything.”

She then turned and left the room, but not before stabbing me in the thigh with an ornately carved dagger. As I writhed in pain on the floor, she muttered in satisfaction, "I'm ready for you, Blanche Lincoln, you bitch!"

h/t: bluegrass pundit


Is this Cass Sunstein rumor true?

I heard a rumor that Cass Sunstein, the new leader of the Democratic Party, advocates allowing bodily fluids and personal hygiene products
to sue people. Can somebody tell Aunt Flo? She needs to know this stuff before it impacts her lifestyle.


24 September 2009

Hate Speech Accuser to be charged with Hate Speech, Neo-Naziism

Canada has an atrocious hate speech law that punishes people for saying politically unpopular things under the excuse that they are hate speech. Richard Warman is a one-man industrial source of accusations of hate speech in Canada. And now, as Ezra Levant (who has been accused of hate speech by Warman and is currently the subject of a suit by Warman) reports, the Canadian Human Rights Commission has formally opened an investigation of Warman for being a hate-speechifying, neo-Nazi, toque-sucking douchebag.

Richard Warman, the hate speech complainant who is personally responsible for all but two section 13 censorship prosecutions this decade, is now being investigated by the Canadian Human Rights Commission for hate speech himself.

I know. It sounds crazy. Just like it sounded crazy when it was revealed that Warman and the CHRC were members of neo-Nazi organizations.

Warman is a former CHRC investigator himself; and even after he left the CHRC they continued to pay his expenses to file and prosecute complaint after complaint. All this, despite the fact he's been under investigation for hate speech for three years.

At the same time as Warman was a complainant, he was a defendant.

At the same time as the CHRC was cutting him cheques to cover his expenses, they were probing his conduct.

At the same time as he held himself out to be an anti-hate crimes activist, his own hateful speech was being probed.


The CHRC investigators have been playing the agitator role in numerous online neo-Nazi groups. Warman was one of them. This enthusiastic neo-Nazi propagandizing from CHRC troubled a Canadian parliamentarian, and an investigation was begun. Now even the CHRC is taking a look at its own star sock-puppet, troll, and moby.

Man I sure hope that this time around the Dreyfuss figure (Levant) gets off scott free and the Esterhazy figure (Warman) gets right royally reamed. Because that's the way I roll, bitches, and that's what ought to happen to Canadouchebags like Warman.


The Story of Stuff is BS

I call Bullshit on this.

Terrorist hippies are burning down American houses every day to "protect nature." This video is propaganda for burning down the house of all the real progress that science has allowed us to achieve in the last 500 years. This is about them burning down your house, your car, your job, and everything that makes your life easier than life was 500 years ago. Societies don't give up and turn back the clock 500 years unless they are ready to die, because that's what happens. This is all about giving up and committing societal suicide.

Fuck off, hippies! I liked you better when you were stoned off your ass. Go back to Berserkely and ruin it some more. Leave the rest of us alone.


22 September 2009

Socialism and Global Warming?...Prince Charles says Groovy, Baby!

Britain's Prince Charles has converted his 38-year-old Aston Martin to run on bio-fuel made from surplus wine, his office revealed Tuesday.

Now....if you believe that, I've got some ocean-front property on the Thames for sale. Charles, who elected you King? Opps, that's right, his Mum won't give up the throne.

The press release states that the car, a 21st birthday present from Queen Elizabeth, has been converted to run on 100 percent bio-ethanol as a way to reduce his carbon emissions. The bio-diesel fuel is made from wine, cooking oil and the crumbs of scones that have been ripped from the mouths of starving London babies.

He's been imploring folks to give up their cars in favor of walking and/or public transport to try to reduce their carbon emissions.

Can someone please tell Prince fruit cake to go screw himself. As far as I'm concerned royalty should be taken out and hung in the public square like so much laundry.

There's been talk on the streets, "Don't tread on me you socialist pig!".......oh..and the brits aren't happy about the Prince's announcement either...

Who is he trying to kid? The gaseous emissions from his stable of polo ponies probably has the carbon-footprint of a mid-size village.

Hypocrite. Self-indulged, elitist snobby hypocrite. It's really annoying how these inbred goofy-looking wussies think they know what's best for everyone. And remember, elitists are the same whether they're in DC, Hollywood or Royalty.

Does the fucking bus even stop by the House of Windsor?

The bio-fuels are processed, converted and provided by Green Fuels Limited at a substantial cost. The British company also provides bio-diesel to power the royal train when Charles needs a brief respite from the narrow, congested streets of a city lined with tiny shops and slowly being taken over by Muslim immigrants hell bent on imposing their culture and religion on it.

But what about his other gasoline-guzzling cars...several Jaguars, an Audi and a Range Rover along with his private jet(s), off-road vehicles, Rolls Royce and Mercedes Benz limos and other assorted toys that would put the carbon output of your basic oil-based paint/pesticide factory to shame.

Let's see here...This guy abandoned Diana for Camilla...and he wants to tell the brits what's best for them?...ROTF

Prince Charles with Camilla, Duchess of Cornhole, on a three-day visit to a whiskey distillery in Northern Ireland last month.

Is it surprising that so many "environmentalists" are unwilling to lead by example? Al Gore's homes use 10x the energy of the average home and he has at least FOUR. It's clear that these people don't believe in the climate-change puke they're spewing, they just want to control OUR lives.

Charles pretends to have a strong interest in environmental issues and in boosting the economy of rural England and he is active with some environmental charities. But as is typical of the elite ruling class, that's just a facade. Let's take the Prince's food company for example...Duchy Originals (I'm not kidding)...they only use ingredients produced at his private organic farm in Cornwall and Never from those grubby little peasant farms scattered around southwestern England.

Can someone please separate this puff from his inheritance so that he can begin to relate to the day to day struggles of regular folks?

And here's the best part..

The wine used for the bio-ethanol comes from current vintage that remains after English wine producers reach the European Union imposed limit...yes, the EU puts a limit on annual wine production. How's that business model workin' for ya?

If only they had a device that would generate power from ignorance and stupidity.

The freedom of 'We the People' is important to our liberties. To come and go as we please throughout our great country is a basic right.

For all our failings here in the US, I'm sure glad that we don't have foolish, out of touch Nobility and Royalty telling us how we should live....

oh wait....


A Pair of Jacks

From Attack Comix


Who are some of these progressive douchebags of whom you speak?

So you want to know who are some of the biggest progressive douchebags around?!

Travis Childers
Dina Titus
Carol Shea-Porter
Ann Kuster
Harry Teague
John Hall
Michael Arcuri
Larry Kissell
Earl Pomeroy
Steve Driehaus
Mary Jo Kilroy
Zack Space
Kathy Dahlkemper
Bryan Lentz
Patrick Murphy
Chris Carney
Paul Kanjorski
John Spratt
Stephanie Herseth Sandlin
Roy Herron
Chet Edwards
Ciro Rodriguez
Glenn Nye
Tom Perriello
Denny Heck
Mike Oliviero
Julie Lassa
Steve Kagen
Steve Raby
Ami Bera
Joe Garcia
Trent Van Haaften
Stephene Ann Moore
John Callahan
Jon Hulburd
Jon Hurlburd
Stephen Pougnet
Lori Edwards
Ravi Sangisetty
Pat Miles
Tarryl Clark
Tom White
Matthew Zeller
Paula Brooks
Manan Trivedi
Brett Carter
Suzan Delbene
Colleen Hanabusa
Robert Dold
Cedric Richmond
Lisa Murkowski
Barbara Boxer
Michael Bennet
Alexi Giannoulias
Robin Carnahan
Paul Hodes
Lee Fisher
Joe Sestak
Harry Reid
Scott McAdams
Kendrick Meek
Charlie Crist
Jack Conway
Patty Murray
Russ Feingold
Richard Blumenthal
Joe Manchin
Chris Coons
Ron Wyden
Kirsten Gillibrand
Mike McMahon
Scott Murphy
Bill Owens
Heath Schuler
Charlie Wilson
Betty Sutton
Kurt Schrader
Mark Critz
Lincoln Davis
Rick Boucher
Gerry Connolly
Rick Larsen
Ann Kirkpatrick
Harry Mitchell
Jerry McNerney
John Salazar
Betsy Markey
Allen Boyd
Alan Grayson
Alan Grayson
Suzanne Kosmas
Jim Marshall
Debbie Halvorson
Bill Foster
Phil Hare
Baron Hill
Leonard Boswell
Frank Kratovil
Gary McDowell
Mark Schauer
Mike Ross
Dennis Cardoza
Christopher Murphy
John Barrow
Melissa Bean
Bruce Braley
Dave Loebsack
John Yarmuth
Chellie Pingree
Tim Walz
Russ Carnahan
Rush Holt
Carolyn McCarthy
Dan Maffei
Bob Etheridge
Mike McIntyre
David Wu
Jason Altmire
Tim Holden
David Cicilline
Jim Matheson
Ron Kind
Bobby Bright
Gabrielle Giffords
Jim Costa
Loretta Sanchez
Ed Perlmutter
Jim Himes
John Carney
Ron Klein
Sanford Bishop, Jr.
Walter Minnick
Joe Donnelly
Ben Chandler
Gary Peters
Ike Skelton
John Adler
Martin Heinrich

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21 September 2009

A Rolling Stone Gathers mo Douchebags

Rolling Stone Magazine, that most even keeled of all the myriad magazines that are rock and roll magazines (notice how that doesn't really say much good about RS?), is reviewing the fall rock and roll releases. Rock and roll musicians, especially the stars, are so freaking lucky and make so much money at such a young age, and get laid so easily without ever making a commitment, that they have no connection whatsoever to the reality that normal people live in. In their experience it is possible to live in a fantasy-world. In the lives of most people who have failed at a few things and had to work their asses off before they succeed, rejecting fantasy logic and coming to an accommodation with reality is a crucial step before they can succeed on their own merit. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to detect the douchebags in the list. There are none as obvious as Led Zeppelin with their shark dildo or Neil Young insulting everyone south of the Mason Dixon line. Turn on your bullshit and douchebag detectors and let's tiptoe through the tulips.

Artist: Pearl Jam
Album: Backspacer
Douchebaggery: Is Eddie Vedder a douchebag? Yes. For one thing, he doesn't sing. He mumbles. It takes a mind-reader to understand his lyrics. His lyrics are even more obscure than Michael Stipe's. And he also likes commies better than the producers who make the manufacturing, mining, and farming profits that eventually work through the economy and pay for his albums. That's why he's a progressive douchebag.

Artist: Mariah Carey
Album: Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel
Douchebaggery: I don't think she's a douchebag. She is a wacko.

Artist: Yoko Ono and the Plastic Ono Band
Album: Between my Head and the Sky
Douchebaggery: Are you fricking kidding me? Total douchebag! Who broke up the Beatles again? She is the platonic ideal of douchebag.

Artist: Paramore
Album: Brand New Eyes
Douchebaggery: Not douchebags as far as I know.

Artist: Monsters of Folk
Album: Monsters of Folk
Douchebaggery: Supposedly a supergroup. RS calls them a group of troubadors. Those are always bad signs when it comes to douchebaggery.

Artist: Ghostface Killah
Album: Ghostdini, Wizard of Poetry in Emerald City
Douchebaggery: Check the name of the album. He's a Wacko! But then I knew that even back in Wu Tang days.

Artist: Avett Brothers
Album: I and Love and You
Douchebaggery: How can banjo players be douchebags when the banjo is the least glamorous instrument this side of the bagpipes?

Artist: Nelly Furtado
Album: Mi Plan
Douchebaggery: It's in fricking Spanish! Douchebag!

Artist: Alice in Chains
Album: Black Gives way to Blue
Douchebaggery: RIP Layne Staley. The remaining douchebags are dancing on your heroin soaked grave. Who is a bigger douchebag: The smack addict who throws away success and the culmination of a lifetime of dreams and hard work for a needle full of forgetfulness; or the supporting musicians who have to keep the memory of the old band going after the magic is gone? I could say the same thing for Mother Love Bone vis a vis Pearl Jam.

Artist: Sean Kingston
Album: Tomorrow
Douchebaggery: He's a kid. He's a rapper. He is in with all the "cool" douchebag rappers. Though poised for douchedom I got no idea if he's there already.

Artist: Miranda Lambert
Album: Revolution
Douchebaggery: She has a song about shooting a radio full of bullets. Isn't that what Elvis did, except he did it to a TV? Copycat douchebaggery.

And here I'm calling it a wrap. Mostly I'm stopping because I like Kris Kristofferson and don't want to pronounce him a douchebag. Even should he be one.


The Venezuelan Slicer's Cure

Venezuelan Routine to Cure a Slice
  • Tee the ball
  • Step behind the ball, imagining the line of flight of the tee shot
  • Mark a spot on the ground in front of the ball
  • Step to the side of the ball, standing parallel to the line of flight
  • Focus on Hugo Chavez's ugly face on the face of the ball
  • Swing and smack Hugo's Chavismo right into the ground
The ball will never go Right. It will fly high and hook like a fricking boomarang.

Of course the ball does what it wants in real life. Sometimes it goes left. Sometimes it goes right. Sometimes it squirts along the ground for a few yards, ending up in a ditch. Sometimes, miracle of miracles, it flys high and goes straight. But the key is that sometimes it goes right. And that must never happen in Hugo Chavez' Venezuela, where everything must always go left.

And that is why Hugo Chavez hates golf.


20 September 2009

A letter from your King

I got a letter from my king at firedouchebaglake in the PO box today. It started like this.

A letter from Your King

My subjects,

Just want to take a minute and get you up to speed on the progress I am making completely deconstructing your government and replacing it with mine. Change is good, well as long as you go with my changes. If you want to make your changes then I don’t really care for it much.

Read on at What Were You Thinking About?


19 September 2009

America, can you smell what Barack is cooking?

Elitist snobbery boils over at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave

The best-dressed woman in Washington DC (what in Sam Hill is she wearing in that photo, a hose-clamp?) went to the marketplace yesterday.

You see, she was in the middle of preparations for dinner when she discovered, quelles horreurs, that she had no certified organic Tuscan kale in the cupboard. Zut alors, what an incipient tragedy! Better get off to the certified organic market a city block away, you know the one she personally ushered through the city permitting process so that the peons who don't have taxpayer-paid private chefs with unlimited kitchen budgets can buy certified organic Tuscan kale and certified Japanese Wagyu beef. She dispatches the Secret Service, who sweep the marketplace for Republicans, drive out all the customers, and shut the marketplace to everybody else, then she rides there in the back of the limousine. Dana Milbank, take it away.

The Secret Service and the D.C. police brought in three dozen vehicles and shut down H Street, Vermont Avenue, two lanes of I Street and an entrance to the McPherson Square Metro station. They swept the area, in front of the Department of Veterans Affairs, with bomb-sniffing dogs and installed magnetometers in the middle of the street, put up barricades to keep pedestrians out, and took positions with binoculars atop trucks. Though the produce stand was only a block or so from the White House, the first lady hopped into her armored limousine and pulled into the market amid the wail of sirens.

Then, and only then, could Obama purchase her leafy greens. "Now it's time to buy some food," she told several hundred people who came to watch. "Let's shop!"

Cowbells were rung. Somebody put a lei of marigolds around Obama's neck. The first lady picked up a straw basket and headed for the "Farm at Sunnyside" tent, where she loaded up with organic Asian pears, cherry tomatoes, multicolored potatoes, free-range eggs and, yes, two bunches of Tuscan kale. She left the produce with an aide, who paid the cashier as Obama made her way back to the limousine.

There's nothing like the simple pleasures of a farm stand to return us to our agrarian roots.

Why does that remind me of the arugula comment and the Obamas' well-known preference for $300 per pound Wagyu steaks from Japan, and Mike Dukakis' deranged recommendation to Iowa farmers that they diversify their corn and soybean crops with Belgian Endive?

SNOB much?

These are the champions of the dispossessed? This is the Democrat Party that controls every single big city bureaucracy boiling over with corruption and poverty everywhere in this country, every year makes every single one worse, and hasn't gotten anyone out of poverty or misery in 45 years? Yeah, the SNOB Democrats are the party of big promises but their results suck donkey dick!


Blog Archive

Why pick on Progressives?

Progressives are neo-barbarian, luddite fools who want to replace all scientific progress with their failed, pseudo-scientific, utopian fairy tale and take us back to the paleolithic period. In other words they are douchebags.

Q: Do you have a problem with Progressive Insurance?

We don't have a problem with their insurance product. But the company is also a major giver of money to politically progressive causes, and because of that the owners and managers are total douchebags.

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