22 December 2009

Hugo Chavez declares Santa Claus the son of the devil

Hugo the Douchebag Chavez accused the US and Colombia of sending unmanned spy planes over Venezuela and ordered his military to shoot down any aircraft detected. The Venezuelan Fister in Chief has been sponsoring FARC narco-terrorists inside Colombia for several years, and evidence was discovered on a rebel laptop last year linking the US Democrat party to the FARC terrorists. But this year, Chavez appears to have mistaken Santa's sleigh, which was conducting preliminary scouting expeditions of Venezuela in order to build plans to evade Burgomeister Meisterburger Chavez's anti-toy squads.

And isn't that what Christmas is all about, getting the toys to the kids and evading the government's perverse anti-toy secret police?


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Why pick on Progressives?

Progressives are neo-barbarian, luddite fools who want to replace all scientific progress with their failed, pseudo-scientific, utopian fairy tale and take us back to the paleolithic period. In other words they are douchebags.

Q: Do you have a problem with Progressive Insurance?

We don't have a problem with their insurance product. But the company is also a major giver of money to politically progressive causes, and because of that the owners and managers are total douchebags.

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